We will help you get your mom off drugs!

I am a mother seeking to terminate the rights of the father of my 2 year old. He was convicted of 1 Felony & 3 Misdemeanors and incarcerated when she was 11 months old. One of the Misdemeanors was from abuse he inflicted upon me and then when I told him it was over and was going to file for a divorce he choked me until I passed out resulting in the Felony and Misdemeanor for breaking the restraining order. The other Misdemeanor was from breaking the order again by contacting me from jail. He recently got out of jail and last month entered a rehab center to deal with his drug abuse issues which is a 12 month program. He would have been in jail for longer but he pled guilty at the last minute…He has a long criminal history and he has never been able to stay off drugs for very long. In the year since he has been gone I have created a wonderful life for myself and my daughter. She is the happiest little girl and I want to keep her that way. I want to keep her safe.

i cant find direct answers anywhere. i know, it’ll be a long hard descision to make… ive got a year to think about it. my parents aren’t abusing, but my mom is addicted to prescription pills and it’s killing her and my dad is a marijunan addict. it sounds lame, but im really against drugs. if i can, id move out of state to sc and live with my boyfriend (his mother has already okayed it knowing my circumstance) but my question is…is it legal?

We live in Indiana and my sister in law told my mother in law today that her and her boyfriend and there two young kids are going to up and move to Illinois to get away from family. We have recently caught on to them doing drugs, by the way. We believe she is addicted to pain pills and doing meth. They are going to Illinois, and they will have no where to live, healthcare, etc… Is there anything I can do or is this some form of neglect??? Any insight would be appreciated. Thanks

Why isn’t it illegal for alcoholics to have children? Why isn’t it illegal for parents who physically fight and argue into the late night to have a child? Why isn’t emotional and mental abuse against the law?

I have a very good friend who is trying to break free from her parents. She has all signs of an abused child (afraid to reach out for help for fear of abuser’s backlash, completely dependent on others outside of abusive home, ect) and her mother has all the signs of an abusive parent (telling my friend not to tell the school or social services about the alcoholism and fights, etc). I am very scared for her. She has been on the verge of giving everything up lately, and I don’t want her to give up.

Isn’t there anything that can be legally done? Can’t the state force her parents to at least rehab or marriage counseling? They’ve already stopped by and said that they can’t take my friend to a foster home but I don’t think they know about the fights and the alcoholism..
If the state won’t do anything, what can she do? How should she keep crying for help? How should she let the state know about what is going on? They didn’t think the situation was serious enough, but my friend is spiraling into a depression she may not get out of.

As a friend, what can I do to help?

Please, if you are an expert on Colorado law, please email me! I could really use your help.

Why isn’t it illegal for alcoholics to have children? Why isn’t it illegal for parents who physically fight and argue into the late night to have a child? Why isn’t emotional and mental abuse against the law?

I have a very good friend who is trying to break free from her parents. She has all signs of an abused child (afraid to reach out for help for fear of abuser’s backlash, completely dependent on others outside of abusive home, ect) and her mother has all the signs of an abusive parent (telling my friend not to tell the school or social services about the alcoholism and fights, etc). I am very scared for her. She has been on the verge of giving everything up lately, and I don’t want her to give up.

Isn’t there anything that can be legally done? Can’t the state force her parents to at least rehab or marriage counseling? They’ve already stopped by and said that they can’t take my friend to a foster home but I don’t think they know about the fights and the alcoholism..
If the state won’t do anything, what can she do? How should she keep crying for help? How should she let the state know about what is going on? They didn’t think the situation was serious enough, but my friend is spiraling into a depression she may not get out of.

As a friend, what can I do to help?

Please, if you are an expert on Colorado law, please email me! I could really use your help.

Why isn’t it illegal for alcoholics to have children? Why isn’t it illegal for parents who physically fight and argue into the late night to have a child? Why isn’t emotional and mental abuse against the law?

I have a very good friend who is trying to break free from her parents. She has all signs of an abused child (afraid to reach out for help for fear of abuser’s backlash, completely dependent on others outside of abusive home, ect) and her mother has all the signs of an abusive parent (telling my friend not to tell the school or social services about the alcoholism and fights, etc). I am very scared for her. She has been on the verge of giving everything up lately, and I don’t want her to give up.

Isn’t there anything that can be legally done? Can’t the state force her parents to at least rehab or marriage counseling? They’ve already stopped by and said that they can’t take my friend to a foster home but I don’t think they know about the fights and the alcoholism..
If the state won’t do anything, what can she do? How should she keep crying for help? How should she let the state know about what is going on? They didn’t think the situation was serious enough, but my friend is spiraling into a depression she may not get out of.

As a friend, what can I do to help?

Please, if you are an expert on Colorado law, please email me! I could really use your help.

I would like to accept a very promising job offer, however it is in Wisconsin, and I live in California. I have a five year old son who does have a relationship with his father, however, I am very worried that his father’s alcoholism is going to have a negative affect in the future. We don’t have any custody agreement in place, and my son has been in my care since he was born with and has had arranged visitiations with his father. His father doesn’t have his own place, he lives with his mother, and smokes a lot of pot, and of course drinks a lot. If I tell him I’m moving, and he doens’t like it, what can he do to keep me here, and can I use his drinking and other habits to fight for full physical and legal custody? I don’t want to start a big fight, but I’m not sure how he is going to react to my news? He may be nice about it, but just in case what are my options?

My mother just had an intracranial hemorrhage stroke last week, & her at-home situation is not the most conducive for her recovery. I currently work full time, but I don’t have enough time at my current employer to qualify for the Family Medical Leave Act (I’ve only been there for nine months). I need to have income to cover my minimal but still substantial bills. But I also would like to be able to care for my mother because I am completely positive that I can’t trust my stepfather to make sure that my mom makes the lifestyle changes that are necessary. My mom is an alcoholic, and she also smokes cigarettes. She also occasionally takes Vicodin (not prescribed). Her husband is also a smoker & an alcoholic, which is why I do not believe that he will be capable of caring & supporting my mother. Does anyone have any experience with caring for a parent & receiving pay through the state? Where would I go to get forms, info or anything else useful? Thanks to anyone who answers?

My sister is not a drug addict or alcholic etc… he just makes much more money than her and they lived a few blocks from each other. He promissed it didn’t mean a thing who has residential custody since they shared her daughter equally. Now he re-married and is relocating to Florida with their child. The baby is only 3years old and a little girl. Little girls need their natural mothers! What can she do? She hired an attorney, much she doesn’t have his type of money.

My sister is not a drug addict or alcholic etc… he just makes much more money than her and they lived a few blocks from each other. He promissed it didn’t mean a thing who has residential custody since they shared her daughter equally. Now he re-married and is relocating to Florida with their child. The baby is only 3years old and a little girl. Little girls need their natural mothers! What can she do? She hired an attorney, much she doesn’t have his type of money.

My sister is not a drug addict or alcholic etc… he just makes much more money than her and they lived a few blocks from each other. He promissed it didn’t mean a thing who has residential custody since they shared her daughter equally. Now he re-married and is relocating to Florida with their child. The baby is only 3years old and a little girl. Little girls need their natural mothers! What can she do? She hired an attorney, much she doesn’t have his type of money.

My son’s mother is a drug addict. When she did her last stint in rehab last year, her mother quit letting my son contact me. When she returned from rehab in late August, her mother had her arrested for domestic violence against her. While this was going on, the grandmother sold/abandoned her house and moved to Virginia. I filed custody papers immediately and was awarded full custody. What steps do I need to take to ensure no problems will arise when I pick my son up in Virginia? Can I just go up there and pick him up? Do I need the Police? Do I need to forward the court order to Virginia? HELP!!!! I want to pick my son up ASAP

My son’s mother is a drug addict. When she did her last stint in rehab last year, her mother quit letting my son contact me. When she returned from rehab in late August, her mother had her arrested for domestic violence against her. While this was going on, the grandmother sold/abandoned her house and moved to Virginia. I filed custody papers immediately and was awarded full custody. What steps do I need to take to ensure no problems will arise when I pick my son up in Virginia? Can I just go up there and pick him up? Do I need the Police? Do I need to forward the court order to Virginia? HELP!!!! I want to pick my son up ASAP

Unfortunately, my 9 year old daughter’s mother is a heroine addict and was ordered by the judge on Dec 31st not to leave the County of San Diego without written permission from me. On January 6th I came home from work and she left a letter stating that she left with my child. she took everything. I have exhausted every possibility. For example, I showed up at the court house on Friday at 6:45am, I waited over 9 hours, at 4pm the ‘extremely rude’ lady peeked her head out and said they will not be seeing anybody else and to not come back until Wed. because they are very busy. I have called the police, the DA’s office. I can not get past the Red Tape, can somebody please get my daughter back. I am losing faith in our justice system. I am about to lose my job because of the toll this is taking, and I am just plain fed up!

He was sent to foster care because his mom was sent to drug rehab for 3 months. He’s also randomly drug tested.

Will his family still be monitored by Child Protective Services after he is returned to his bio mom?

Will it be a “probationary” return or will he be FREE & CLEAR from foster care?

…or will he always be monitored until he turns 18?

Ok im not sure if anyone knows but I live in FL and my husband has a little girl who’s 8 by another woman, well about a year ago she moved up to OK, and what i was wondering was is it legal for her to do that, he is paying child support and has been for about 7 yrs now i know the child support has nothing to do with it but he doesnt get to see her, until now they came down for a week and its been over a year since he has seen his little girl, her mother is listed as the cusodial parent and he is the non-custodial parent does he have any say in what she does, we need to know what we need to do, we have had her for three days and were suppose to take her back tonight but when we got to where they were staying noone was there(her mother knew what time we were bringing her home) and my husband called and she said to leave her with the neighbor which the little girl doesnt know, and i told him no that she could come and get her from our house, come to find out the mother is out drinking and said she couldnt come and get her..its a messed up situation what can we do if anything???

My mother has many issues, alcoholism since I was a child, abusive, she left my dad and all of us when I was 16 and had no sense of remorse. She is remarried to an abuser and drug dealer and he physically abuses her. I have no relationship with her for personal reasons but I am very nervous now hearing what she now has gotten into. We think she is oh god this is hard…PLEASE BE KIND!! I think she is sleeping around to get money for dugs.

I am thinking of an intervention and I don’t know how to go about it. Even though I do not associate or talk to her and haven’t for 11 years I am worried. She is a compulsive liar and you never know when she is telling the truth. I do most of the time because what ever she says, think the opposite and that is it. My aunts (her sisters) want to help her. My oldest sister has her at her house all the time…I don’t know how to tell her. I try but she doesn’t want to find fault in “our mother”.

I want an intervention!!! She my mom is 52 years old !!!!
I have seeked therapy for myself because of all the abuse I grew up with and her abandoning her. I just know she is on a downfall really bad and know she needs help now. It’s hard to open my arms for her since she does not acknowledge any of us. Just my older sister who she spends every day with. Does anyone know who to contact as a therapist or who that person is that helps with an intervention???

Oh she is my mom by blood but not my mom by love. She has never loved us and we had to learn everything for ourselves…TRUST ME! SHE was always W*horing around.
MY heart is big even though she does not care for me but I hate to see people like this. I think about my nieces and nephews who talk about “grandma”. That’s what gets to me. She has lived this life LONG ENOUGH. She has been arrested and then after a few weeks let go. She has had her worst bottoms and I think a right intervention is what needs to be done!

I did go to a daughters of alcoholic women group and it helped greatly but not the drugs and sleeping around!!! UGH i’m disgusted. I just found out. I am over weighed in this. No one else really focuses on all her problems, they just say she works a lot. My siblings which we are 7 are in denial. I had already let go of her a few years ago but with this…I don’t know it’s really upsetting.!!!!!She is my mom and I don’t want her living on the street!
OH I’ve seen a Phsychologist and Psychitrist for years. That’s why I know she needs help. I’m just scared to get involved because when I do she brings me down. She wears me down!
I have not spoken to her since I was 16 when she left me to care for my younger siblings all 4. I haven’t forgiven her for it because she feels no remorse. Ugh…i’m just really stressed because I know my siblings will not want to help much. She needs treatment and she doesn’t have insurance. I feel like i’m stuck. She is in so much trouble left and right i’m scared if I offer her my home she will steal from me or take advantage and lie as usual.

I just don’t want her to die and know I have the intelligence to help but didn’t force her to.

I know it takes the person to change but sometimes she needs to see she has people behind her. She is not close to us so this will be VERY VERY hard!

My mom is an alcoholic,divorced,very controlling person, which makes me freaked because when i tell her that im going to my dads for christmas, she is gonig to either freak. Ihavent been with my dad in the past 2 christmas’. When do you think i should tell her, before or after I leave to go to my dads?

Like many people I have a troubled teen brother(17). I myself moved out of my house once I turned 18 because I considered my home unsafe if he is there. My mom has been struggling with him since my father passed away of cancer 9 years ago. My brother hits my mom calls her names and has no respect what so ever. Its really sad for me to see this happen and not to be able to do anything about it. My mom has tried everything the houston police department doesnt seem to want to help when she calls them to report my brother beating her or stealing money from her. When she tries sending him to a rehab they wont accept him because he has to be the one asking for help not my mom. I never thaught that here in america it would be ok for a 17 yearold to beat his own mother and use drugs and everyone would be ok about it, or wont even try to help! i would appreciate some advice, I really would.

Dear Sir:
I am not sure to send this e-mail when I have finshed it. I’m praying it makes it’s way into the right hands..I desperately need some intervention. My story is long and I apologize if I don’t tell it well but it truely comes from my heart…
In June of 2004 my husband and I took in my cousins children. 2 beautiful girls that immediatly stole our hearts. We agreed to this only because we were told the parents were giving them up for adoption. They said we had to wait for them to get out of jail to sign the papers..We trusted them. A months later the mother was released from county jail and we had to return the girls. In November of the same year and the mother called us again and asked if we could keep the children for 6 months while she went back to jail. No one else wanted them. They were 1 & 2 yrs old. Of course, we took them back gratefully. The mother ended up doing 13 months in prison on drug charges…The father did too.
My husband and I called every agency including DCFS to try to keep custody of the children and was told we were to far down the blood line to have any say in the children and that it was DCFS’s policy to clean the parents up, not to remove the children. Once again, we had to turn the children over and the mother refused to let us see them for 7 months.
In September of 2006, I get another call from the mother asking if I’ll take them and put them in school because she had no one to take care of them. Of course, I went and got them. I had them for another for another 11months.
In August of 2007, the grandfather was released from prison and reunited with the grandmother, who was also recently released from prison, decided they wanted the children back where they lived so once again, we had to return the children. 3 months later my husband and I gave up our jobs and apartment and moved to the city the girls lived in so we could at least see them. That month, the mother went back to jail, the father was released from prison and the children lived at their grandparents and we weren’t allowed to see them.
In August of 2008, my husband and I had to move where there was work and begged the mother when she got out of jail to let the kids come w/ us and we would help her find a place and get off the dope. The following month, the mother was busted smoking crack and the children were placed with the grandparents thru Luthern Services.We have not seen them since!!! We have been approved for visitation over a year ago but denied the visits because their Grandparents doesn’t want us to have anything to do with them so DCFS abided by their wishes. I can’t understand why the children were placed with them in the first place. They both have extensive histories of prison, violence and drug abuse just like the parents.
I recently called Luthern Services and was informed that the grandparents want to adopt which means we will never get to see the children we have loved and raised all these years. Don’t we have any rights? I have called agency after agency for the last 5 years trying to adopt these kids. I have followed all the rules and depended on the system not to fail us or the children but once again it has done just that!!! Can we contest the adoption and file ourselves? This is so unfair to us and the children. If you can get them away from the grandparents and convince them you wont tell, they will tell you the want to live with us. Each time we have had to turn them over they had to be pried out of our arms. Isn’t there anyone out the who can help us? All of us!!! Imagine loving and raising 2 children as your own all this time then be denied of seeing them ever again. This is just wrong on so many levels!!! Even if we cannot contest the adoption, is there anyway we can legally get some type of visitation? We are desperate. Everyday without them is a living hell!!! It’s like part of us is lost. Please help us or at least point us in the right direction for help. We have about 6 months before the adoption and we don’t know what else to do!!!

Thank You,
I have been doing internet searches for weeks but can’t seem to get anywhere. Just more phone #s of people who “can’t help” us. I was hoping to come across someone here that might have the right answers, not to cry “boo hoo” !!!
I forgot to add than I live in Central Illinois and I have called several attorneys and the few that will concider want huge retainers and all the others don’t want to fight DCFS. I have been calling state agencies for the last 5 years trying to get these children removed from that environment.