We will help you get your mom off drugs!

I asked this earlier today but i got 0 answers, so im reposting it. Thanks so much if you can help.

Well, all was good until she moved school. She got into the wrong crowd – the kind of girls that are skipping school, smoking and causing problems all at age 13. She comes from a fantastic family and her mum is up to her wits end and cracked last night – saying she could ‘do whatever you want, i don’t care anymore’
Personally i think a mother should never give up on a child like that, but her daughter has been lying to her about certain things and its caused a massive fight between them.

Now, her daughter isn’t at school and she is at work.

This concerns me because i live with them, and my boyfriend is very depressed over it. He’s hardly spoken a word since, and his mum keeps trying to drag him into a battle that isn’t his. His parents are divorced.

Her mum is keeping tabs on her school attendance, she rings every morning to ask if she is at school and her daughter knows that.

She has also been spoiled her whole life, which is making her think she can do whatever she wants as she has no discipline.

What can we do? Sorry its so long :(
lol, alright

10 PTS BEST ANSWER!!!!!!!!!!!! EVEN IF ITS A BAD ONE SOMEONE HAS TO GET IT!!!!!!!

to your liking? :P

I know you need to cut druggies off unless they get help but what happens if you also treat them like you hate them?

My brother is on Meth and he did a lot of horrible things to our family over the years. When our Mom passed away I finally retaliated and did a lot of horrible things to him. To be honest though it didn’t make me feel any better.

I am wondering what losing all family support will do to a drug addict?

Is there any Minnesota case law that states a family member has a right to view a Will. My father died two weeks ago and my estranged siblings [co-representatives to father’s Will and POA’s to mother] refuse to show me the Will; yet everyone in my family including grandchildren have read the Will. I had many conversations with my father over the years and he told me that he was placing certain property in a trust for all six children so it could never be sold. I believe that my mother is a vulnerable adult; she has NO short term memory what-so-ever, and the POA’s are using this to their advantage. I contacted local social services, but they don’t believe that she has been financially exploited [yet.] My Mom will sign anything put in front of her. I am number 4 our of 6 children and estranged from family due to older brother sexual abuse and prominent alcoholism amongst family. I was advocate for Mom but my siblings moved her out of her home and into their Wisconsin homes. Seven days ago my Mom was telling me how much she loved me and we scheduled a lunch date and today I finally got a hold of her but she told me that she never wants to see me again and hangs up on me before I can say anything. Siblings never contacted me for the “reading of the Will” and their lawyer says he needs permission to show it to me. I am worried that anger and revenge have taken hold and I could be written out of the Trusts that my father set up in his Will. My parents had individual Wills leaving each other their joint property. My Mom has not been declared incompetent, as siblings don’t want to do that because as POA’s they claim to be making decisions jointly with her. She may remember what she is signing one second, but only minutes later will completely forget what she just did. If the Trusts are “revocable” can the POA’s change my Mom’s Will and disinherit me? I know about conservatorship and guardianship but that will cost thousands that I don’t have. Should I sue to see the Will? Help. THANK YOU!

This is hard to sum up… I grew up with a mom who was bipolar and never taking her meds appropriately. Her emotions controlled the house and even caused some very serious issues between me and my younger sister (my only sibling). My mom became an alcoholic 8 years ago, began having an open affair, my dad divorced her 3 years ago and she is now engaged and living with the “other man”. My sister is very overprotective of my mom (still falling into her victim bs due to the alcoholism). My sister is still “co-dependent” thinking she can save her and when I speak with my sister, we just do not discuss my mom at all. I am tired of the middle of the night phone calls while she is drunk telling me she hates me and wishes I were never born… I guess I have always been the black sheep because I never gave in to my mother’s crap and my sister is the golden child because she always did and still does. My sister came for a visit and physically attacked me in my home (with all of our children present). She has done this before to me and my mother during visits with her. She is 31 years old and my dad is making excuses for her behavior (she is under stress due to selling her house and moving and the baby not sleeping well). Her 2 sons were completely calm (still playing with their toys like it did not phase while she was on this rampage screaming and beating the crap out of me- like they are numb to it) while my 4 children were hysterical and terrified. I have tried to have a normal relationship with her for the sake of the kids but I can’t let this happen in my home or around them again (this happened years ago when my oldest was young and she attacked me with him in my arms). If I cut her out, I will have to cut out my parents too… my mom only calls when she is drunk anyway (so that is a no brainer) but my dad will continue to keep my mom and sis up to date on my life if I continue to keep contact with him. I let my oldest son go visit him for a week this july and he promised my son would not go to my mom’s house… he sent him anyway and lied to me and told my son to lie to me and my son was put in the middle of a physical argument with her and her fiance who both were drunk- my son called my dad to pick him up and my dad told him to hang tight until the morning and not to call me. My dad doesn’t think he did anything wrong by lying to me and telling my son to lie to me and leaving him there or sending him there in the first place. Should I cut them out? No matter what, I love them because they are my family but they are hurting me and I have worked very hard for my children to have the normal life I never got to grow up in….but my family is just tainting that. My husband thinks I need to just let them go… it just hurts so much!

I had to move back in with my mom. I’m 28 years old. Reason for moving back in with her is because of a Failed Marriage and the house belonged to my ex’s Family. So Until I find a new place of my own, my mother talked me into moving back in with her temporarily. My mother has always had a major drinking problem, things have become much worse for her . Recently she adopted a 19 year old foster daughter whos living here with us, she’s being paid to care for. The problem is, that my mother has a short fuse when she drinks. Its like she looks for problems. I’m worried about her getting into legal trouble because today, for example, I walk into the house, my mother is going off on the foster girl, because someone posted some semi naked photo’s of a woman on her facebook page. My mother happened to look over her shoulder while she was looking at her facebook page. She was screaming at her about she doesn’t want her looking at naughty things on the computer because she can get in trouble for that. My mother knows nothing about face book, and the foster girl was trying to explain to her that she did not put those on her wall, someone else did. I stepped in to explain to my mother that she has no control of what other people put on her page, my mother snapped back and said ” FINE THEN LET HER USE YOUR COMPUTER” Storms into her room and slams the door. All the while she was screaming and fussing about this , she’s standing there holding a big glass of wine in her hand.

About 2 hours later, I’m out of the house, my mother calls my cell phone. Says to me ” You need to stay out of my business, I’m not going to get in trouble over her looking at those things then hangs the phone up”. This foster girl does have some issues, she dresses very provocatively sometimes. Wears booty looking shorts with tank tops… I do understand that she should try to dress more conservatively, but I hear my mother talking to her, she says thing to her like ” You shouldn’t dress like a Hoochie momma”. And things like ” You should dress like my other daughter, who dresses more consevatively, maybe you should try to dress like she does”. It blows my mind. And my mother will say these things to her while I’m standing in the room. I pulled my mother aside and told her she should not use comparisons, and to try to go about it with a different approach, I could see how that may hurt her feelings. My mother gets angry with me and tells me she’s not doing anything wrong, and she is telling her for her own good. This foster girl comes from a rough backround, she’s not used to living middle / upper class. I don’t know what to do. The girl is 19 years old, I can understand my mother trying to help her out. Though My mother is being very harsh, with her approach, on top of that she’s drinking most days when she’s saying these things to her. I don’t know what to do.

Can My mother end up getting in trouble for this? I don’t really know if what I’m saying is even right? Maybe my mothers right. But It just seems that telling her she looks ” Sleazy, Hoochie Mama, ” And all this all of the time, on top her my mother telling her daily that Tattoo’s are Trashy… ( This girl has tattoos) Just feels odd.

When I was still struggling with what I was, my mother confronted me and demanded if I was bisexual, and that if I was it was against God, and a sin. I turned red, felt panic and said “No, I’m not!” which I was in no position to say. And my mom said “good…” an ex of mine outed me to her out of revenge for dumping them, and “fear for my soul”.
I want to come out, but I’m worried that my denial before will effect their belief in me now. Also my mother is very gody, and homophobic. She likes to say how children shouldn’t be exposed to homosexuality, and grounds her children for saying the word “gay” she likes to compare homosexuality to alcoholism. My dad, he liked to say how people are gay because of malformed brains, and he believes gay people have an agenda, and he cried when one of his friends daughters came out.
Part of me wonders if they already know, another is bothered by my lie. And another wonders if I should ever tell them. If they kick me out, I do have places to go, although my life will be a little harder. I just wanted someone else’s thoughts on the issue.

getting in a fight with my dad because my husband instead for my drunk sister in law to stay well my parents ended up leaving and a few hours later my sister in law ended accusing my husband of rape now my parents think that he is a bad person even when hospital reports came back that nothing happened? Now when ever i try to talk to my mother about it we end up in argument.

When I was younger, my dad used to get drunk. Him and my mom would yell at each other practically every night, but it never got to physical abuse. I don’t think his alcoholism ever progressed to a state where it seriously affected me, but I could be misjudging things. When I was about ten years old, they separated, had an ugly separation and divorce filled with harassment (through me at times) and other problems. Now I live with my mom, who never drinks. She’s had a bad childhood with an adopted unmedicated bipolar mother, so she has her share of scars too. I have found out that my mother must be a co-alcoholic, she has the extreme mood swings, outbursts about tiny things when you least expect it, etc. Then after these outbursts it is like everything is fine, and most times I receive a serious apology, which doesn’t stop the cycle from repeating again. Now that you all have the story, here are my questions: How badly was I really affected by my dad’s drinking, what is going on with my mom and how badly is her behavior affecting me, and what would happen if my mom started drinking a little bit?

I got out of a horrible relationship where the father (5 years of living together, I guess he cracked when he found I was pregnant) smoked weed in the house while I was pregnant. He threw stuff at me, hit me while I was pregnant so I left him.

However, my family has huge morals for me and my father and mother can’t stand that I am a “single mom”. Should I tell them how much of a druggie he is? He wasn’t into drugs until I got pregnant. It’s like he lost his mind… why does my family hate me? Because I didn’t get married and am a sinner?

Ok so last night there was some drama with my stepbrother. First of all let me say that he has a drug and alcohol problem and a history of mental “issues”. Well he is 19 he works out of town but he recently failed a drug test and is required to go to “rehab” before he can return to work. So he has returned home and was living with my mother (his stepmother). Her husband (his father) works out of town. My 19 yr old brother also works out of town but his 19 yr old girlfiend lives with my mother. She doesnt work and she sits at the house all day. Well for the past week or so since he has been home, he has just been hanging out at home with my brothers gf. My brother doesnt like him being around his gf so much because its obvious my stepbro is trying to get in her pants. So when my brother is around is gf is mean to my stepbro but when my brother isnt around his gf and my stepbro are BFFS. But neways that is just a little history. Last night my stepbrother and my brother gf were at my cousins. My stepbrother had apparently been drinking and taking pills all day. My cousin was cutting his hair and he grabbed her ass. Then when her husband asked him about it he called her a liar and a bitch. Well my cousins husband broke his nose. My stepbrother then started crying and telling everyone how much he loved them and blah blah blah. My cousin then told Samantha (bros gf) to leave and she didnt listen. It was like hello get out! Finally they left. Well on the way home my stepbrother fell asleep. So Samantha left him in the car. My mother locked him out of the house. He woke up sometime during the night and broke windows to get into the house. My mother met him in the sun room and told him that she was going to call the cops. He called her an f***** bi***. She slapped him. THIS IS WHERE IT GETS CRAZY!! He ran to my brothers room and grabbed a gun. My mom and Samantha ran into my mothers room and locked the door. He broke the door down. They told him the cops were on the way. He replied that he would kill them, kill the cops, then kill himself. Then he stuck the gun in his mouth. My mother and Samantha ran into my brothers room and locked the door, then locked themselves in the closet (it locks from the inside). Finally the cops got to the house. They couldnt find my stepbrother. Finally they found him, IN THE POND!! They got him out, got him in the driveway. He passed out in the driveway. He fell down and busted his head up again! Then when he came to, he started telling the cops that he only smokes weed to get closer to GOD because Moses spoke to GOD through a BURNING BUSH!! He is now in the hospital, waiting to be transferred to a mental hospital.

Thats all nuts right, but the part that bothers me the most is that my mom has been the one buying him all the alcohol. Like she will go to the liqour store and buy him over $100 worth of liqour, and a 30 pack of beer! She buys him beer everyday. And Samantha drives him around to buy drugs. All they do all night is drive around buying pills, weed, and who knows what else? I mean what do they expect. He has been taking Xanax and drinken Patron for a week. Even a stable person would go crazy. This is the second time my stepbrother has pulled a gun and threatened to kill everyone. The first time he was 17. If you know someone has a drug problem why would you enable them? My mother has a long history of it. My first stepfather did meth my entire life until his heart blew up when I was 17. This is the kind of unstable enviroment that I do not want my child in (im pregnant). My mother sees nothing wrong with contributing alcohol to minors. She allows them to do drugs at her house. I told my aunt today that I didnt want my child around my mom and she of course told my mother. Now IM THE BAD GUY!!!! My family thinks Im crazy because I think they are WHITE TRASH, they think that something is wrong with ME???

BTW I do not live with them all. My husband and I have our own house. But she bought a house .5 miles down the road after we bought our house. And she always brings my husband into all the drama because she knows that I do not approve and consider myself above that kind of behavior. Anyways what do i do?

When I was about 8 years old, my mom decided one child wasn’t enough and decided to adopt a 2 year old boy. He was a horrible little brat. He swore at her and my grandma multiple times, pulled my hair, behaved nasty to every one when he didn’t get his way, and abused me and my mom physically and my mom, emotionally.

While growing up with him, I learned to avoid his mischievous behavior from stealing toy cars from his kindergarten class and little things like that. He still was very nasty to my mom but loved my dad. I was pretty much in the background because he was such a hassle to take care of but I was about 12 by the time and knew how to take care of myself somewhat.

We moved when I was 14 and I was going to start high school. He started to run away and take things from my parents. He’s screamed at my mom and told her she was an attention-whore and almost punched her. He was verbally and emotionally attacking my mom and my dad was at work all the time so he wasn’t there for most of it. He then made it so worse that he manipulated my dad to move out with him and leave my mom and I alone. It was really bad. But I didn’t know the real reason why he moved out until recently.

Now, we have moved again and I am 20 years old and going to college, my brother 14, and he started drinking, smoking pot, chewing tobacco, disrespecting the house and my mom, trying to get my dad to move out again and leave my mom, and I’m in the middle of all of this. Just about 3 weeks ago, he got arrested for drinking, hanging out with gang members, and peeing in public. He’s in a substance abuse hospital and he’s claiming to my dad through phone calls that he’s getting better. Before all of this, he said he was fine and didn’t need help.

My mom has now wrapped herself in her own misery and is blaming my dad and I that we weren’t there for her and we’re not doing enough for her. I was there for her when my dad left and helped her recover from the tragedy. I was hurting too but it doesn’t seem to bother her that I have feelings too. She screams at me when I tell her how I feel and she makes me feel like I’m not important to her. She blames my dad for not protecting her and being a “united front” with her to protect her from her horrible mistake of adopting my brother. She yells at me, saying I don’t appreciate her and the things she’s done for me and that I don’t do anything for her. She’s making me feel like I am nothing and that I have don’t everything to make her unhappy.

I feel like I’m not good enough, lonely, and unimportant. She thinks my dad and I are plotting against her because we’re spending more time with each other. We don’t want to spend time with her because she’s always stuck on my brother and how he’s treated her and that she has to do EVERYTHING. I don’t know what to do any more. She is so self-absorbed and claiming that my dad and I are selfish and self-absorbed and pretty much saying “woe is me”.

I’ve asked to help her and she turns me down. I’ve asked her to go out to lunch with me and she turns it down. She claims I don’t do anything for her or with her when all I try to do is make her feel better! I don’t know what to do any more. I need help. She won’t go to a therapist because she thinks their loads of crap and she won’t let go of her past.

I’ve been thinking of moving out with my boyfriend and starting a new chapter in my life. But I don’t think I could get a good job and keep up with rent for the apartment. I’m stuck but I want to leave. I want to be happy again. I don’t want to be blamed for something I didn’t do. I’ve tried everything, and even my dad has been trying everything to make her happy again. But the only solution she wants is my brother to be dead.

I was just wondering about this since my mom wants to be able to take part in my dad’s treatment. Are there such treatment programs that will allow her to do this?

JACKSONVILLE, FL –- An illegal alien who hit and killed a Jacksonville karate instructor while driving under the influence of alcohol was sentenced to 10 years in prison Monday.28-year-old Marliano Alberto accepted the sentence as part of a plea bargain. The judge also revoked his license for the rest of his life.Police say Alberto was drinking and speeding when he crashed into 27-year-old Russell Nevado’s car on A.C. Skinner Drive last April.Nevado’s family, friends and students filled the courtroom Monday for the sentencing. Several people spoke, including Nevado’s fiancée, Sherry Mendoza.
“Russell represented the meaning of being a true angel,” she told the courtroom. “He lived life to the fullest, putting thought and effort into other people, his family and himself.”Nevado was a black belt karate instructor at his family’s studio. He and Mendoza planned to get married, start a family and open another karate studio.

His mother, Marilyn Nevado, broke down in tears as she described the day police showed up at her door to tell her about her son’s death. She says that she didn’t believe them until the officers showed her his driver’s license.

“It felt like my chest had been stabbed many times and someone ripped my heart out of my chest,” she said.

She said their family hasn’t been the same since Nevado’s death, but she hopes the sentencing will help them move forward with their lives. Still, she said, burying her son was the hardest thing she ever had to do.

“With no hesitation I would have given my life for my son to have lived longer.”

http://www.firstcoastnews.com/news/news-article.aspx?storyid=92015

The slant of your question: What do you think about this- do you truly expect anyone to say it is great or similar? My question asked what is your view point ,we are still allowed to have view points are we not ?

My mom divorced my father when I was thirteen years old after he refused to get rehab for drugs and alcohol and the house fell into foreclosure for the third time. At the same time, i was sick in bed for nearly three months unable to do a thing. I was medically out of school and on bed rest with doctor visits twice a week. While my father was out working, drugging and putting out fires. Sure, for a living he built houses and is currently a foreman for a building company, and being a volunteer firefighter (at the time), it’s a good mix. but he was never home when i was sick.
Meanwhile, you see. my sister (half sister) got pregnant with a little girl. That girl is now three years old and was abused right before her third birthday by her stepmother. my niece was than put into my mother’s home until my sister could establish herself. She had no stable home and no job.
Today- Me, my mom, and my niece share a two bedroom small apartment. My niece wakes up on average atleast three times a night, and i share a room with her. which only stresses me out and makes me immune system go down. not good, especailly since i’m getting ready to go to college. The first one in the family (and extended) to even graduate. I now spend my time volunteering at the firehouse, my father once belonged to and i wouldn’t leave it for the world. that’s one thing in my whole life that makes me happy. A few nights a week, my mom’s boyfriend comes with his daughter. he sleeps in my moms room and his daughter sleeps on the little floor space i have in my room. there’s no room at all! he lives with his mother, where theres no room for us eaither. better yet, its in a different town which would mean me moving away for the last six months of my senior year after being in the same school district since kindergarten. While dyfs finds out what’s going on on granted custody, my mom and i and my niece need to find a new place to stay, in my current town. but there is nothing cheap enough anywhere for us.
we need help. please give me suggestions, ideas. anything.

I’ve had a miserable childhood so far. My mother raised two sons with a drug-abusing boyfriend who has been to jail countless times, rehab didn’t help him. She could never get a high paying job, she struggled paying bills and being a single parent. She could never get ahead. Her father died four years before her first born. Her mother was the daughter of a wealthy family, a family that her mother thought would support her as she grew older. Her family unfortunately died weeks apart from eachother, each dying off one by one, until it was just her and her brother. Her mother favored her brother, and her brother received the fortune in the will and everything in the family name. My grandmother was left alone with no money, a family friend took her in to live with her. While my mom stayed at the house and lived on her own, eventually finding a boyfriend who she had two boys with. Fourteen years of conflict and police interference, my father eventually got in touch with his family in Texas, who took him in, so he left California to escape the temptations of drugs, for we live in a busy city. He eventually married a woman and took in three step children three years after leaving. My mother and brother live a horrible life, we have no money. My Grandmother does not cooperate, she is verbally abused by the man who took her in, he attempts to alienate her from her family. He claims we are nothing but drama, but she can not leave him because she is in his will and we could never thrive if she was on her own. We have no money for rent, my mom had to date a guy who helps pay half the rent. My Grandmother is retired obviously, she receives social securities checks once a month, for a grand. More than half that grand goes to the man she lives with because he paid off my mother’s credit card debt, which was sixteen thousand dollars. My mom will never bring home enough money to ensure us a happy life, her boyfriend has anger problems and is not looking to better our existing family. My grandmother is unhappy, is abused verbally, sad, has no place to go other than living with the man, who is my Godfather by the way. He is tired of having to deal with our problems, he is tired of having to pay for our troubles, he has to loan his car to us because my mother has to loan HER car to her boyfriend because his car broke down, and they both need to drive to work. What’s there to do? And don’t say talk things out, my Grandmother is stubborn and my Godfather never had kids, his wife died, his stepchildren resented him, he’s grumpy, and we’re screwed, we always knew we were.

My 34 yr old brother wants to come stay with me again. He has no job, no money, Nothing. He has been a binge crack user for about 8 yrs and is always wanting to “get his life straight” and I have always been there. We have 2 kids and really no room for him or the extra money to keep him up til he does better and the last time he was here, he binged for no reason (stress’s). When he binges, he just disappears for about a week without a word and won’t answer his phone. Worries the family sick. Mom is fed up and no one wants him, because of his track record. Everytime we try to help, he relaps. However he is my only sibling and the younger and I feel torn between obligation to family and not tolerating him. HELP

What I mean is, I drank for a looong time and knew I had a big time problem. Everyone knew that. Now that I’ve gotton intensive treatment and regularly attend meetings for help, I think I’m doing great. I have a new lease on life, enjoy new, sober friends and am back enjoying my family, and they enjoy me. The only thing is, my mom keeps wondering, “Do you still have to go to meetings? Are you cured?” It would break my heart to tell her I will never be ‘cured’–it puts a negative spin on things. But I don’t want to be dishonest. What should I say when she brings it up? My dad won’t really say too much, but he’s glad. Seems worse of a stigma sometimes admitting it to them what I am then when I was falling down all the time embarassing them. sorry so long. Thanks!

I wanna call someone about my mom.

What I mean is, I drank for a looong time and knew I had a big time problem. Everyone knew that. Now that I’ve gotton intensive treatment and regularly attend meetings for help, I think I’m doing great. I have a new lease on life, enjoy new, sober friends and am back enjoying my family, and they enjoy me. The only thing is, my mom keeps wondering, “Do you still have to go to meetings? Are you cured?” It would break my heart to tell her I will never be ‘cured’–it puts a negative spin on things. But I don’t want to be dishonest. What should I say when she brings it up? My dad won’t really say too much, but he’s glad. Seems worse of a stigma sometimes admitting it to them what I am then when I was falling down all the time embarassing them. sorry so long. Thanks!

like legal adoption but it would make ur family and theirs combined.
cuz my friends family has adopted 9 kids and i love them all like my family anyway and they offered (so i can get away from my alcoholic mom) but i dont want to hurt her feelings/break her spirit.

i really would like to be a part of their family

itd be kentucky laws btw, if that matters…