We will help you get your mom off drugs!

I want to know if it is me or I am crazy,Please help, Ok Im 27years old I have been drinking on and off for years and for the last three weekends I have came home and drank I live with my boyfriend of two years whom I love very much, and he does not work and pays no bills(also he paid 2400$ to get us in this place and in his eyes I have forever been in debt to him) and my mothers husband just lost his leg in a motorcycle accident I have been very stressed and trying not to drink but I have been coming home every weekend to find that my house is a mess,and he needs me to drive him to the store etc.and the cats have not been taken care of,also my boyfriend has been smoking pot with our female neighbor and speaking w her while im gone all week and this bothered me very much and I would come home and not had any intentions to drink and he would start in right away telling me Are you gonna drink fucking alcoholic slut basically anything he can to hurt me and I begged pleaded and cryd and told him I cant have him hanging out with that neighbor smoking pot and conversating (he is not supposed to be smoking at this point)……soooo he promises me he wont….low and behold he quits smoking pot and continues talking to this woman while im gone working and paying the bills(mind you he has no car and I have to drive him anywhere)also he says its just friends and to be honest I don’t think its appropriate to do so while im gone all week knowing it makes me uncomfortable……sooo this last weekend I come home early go to the store buy steaks n good eats for the night and rented a movie(also not I did not buy any alcohol cause I did not intend to drink at all) …. first thing he says to me is I know all about you and you have done this and that and it would take me to long to right point being also while I was gone he started talking to my cousin sadie and she told him basically 1/3 truth and 2/3rds absolute bullshit and I went ballistic because I being attacked by him and he was believing all the crap she was telling him(also it was not about cheating or anything it was things about my alcoholism from the past and she lied about things I have done she told him that I had wrecked my grandmothers car that I had burnt alot of bridges and crazy shit that he ate up in a heart beat not to mention she is very pretty and he falls for that crap) sooooo I was crying and very upset and told him I couldn’t take this anymore and low and behold I left and got very very drunk (bad descion) ultimately it boils down to this am I crazy drunk or do I need to remove myself from this situation please help!!
Also his reasoning behind stressing me out is that hes concernd about my well being and thats why he was talking to them but I think thats crap when I make an effort and out and out tell him what will help me and I cant see how calling someone names and accusing them of lies and saying yaa go put all your money down your throat thats what your gonna do anyways I know all about you, is gonna help any alcoholic but please tell me if im wrong I need answers

My fiance’s brother was released from jail last year around thanksgiving. since then he was living with his step brother and his wife. he got his steb brothers wife pregnant and his family disowned him and would not let him live at thier home. he moved in with the pregnant wife and did not get a job in the whole 7 months he was living with her. she has kicked him out because the only jobs he could ever get (with his jail background) are ranch hand side jobs paying just a few dollars a day. now he is living in a motel with a bunch of bad people doing all kinds of drugs (ice, speed etc…) and is completely depressed about losing “the love of his life”. me and my fiance attempted to help him by bringing him to the city in hopes of a better chance for him to find a good job and his perole officer had called in sick that day so he could not leave. we were forced to go back home and give him rent money for another week. i am so worried he is going to end up back in jail or become a drug addict or try to commit suicide. i dont know what to do. we cant let him live with us because he has to register as a sex offender and my mom does not approve of that. we can not bring him to the city now because we cant afford to pay $210 a week waiting for him to get a job (which takes up to a month sometimes). my family has told me to give it to GOD and let him handle everything. what should i do. i cant bare to see my fiance upset when he finds out that his brother has gone back to jail or died from drugs/suicide.
UPDATE:
he is not a bad guy. ive known him since he was released. he is actually the sweetest guy in my finace’s family. i know he is making some huge mistakes right now because of how hard his life since jail. the only reason he was put in jail was because he had a 16 or 17 year old g/f when he was around 20 and he cheated on her with another girl his age and the 17yr old got mad at him and reported him to get back at him. he in no way is a “child malester” or a “rapist”

My fiance’s brother was released from jail last year around thanksgiving. since then he was living with his step brother and his wife. he got his steb brothers wife pregnant and his family disowned him and would not let him live at thier home. he moved in with the pregnant wife and did not get a job in the whole 7 months he was living with her. she has kicked him out because the only jobs he could ever get (with his jail background) are ranch hand side jobs paying just a few dollars a day. now he is living in a motel with a bunch of bad people doing all kinds of drugs (ice, speed etc…) and is completely depressed about losing “the love of his life”. me and my fiance attempted to help him by bringing him to the city in hopes of a better chance for him to find a good job and his perole officer had called in sick that day so he could not leave. we were forced to go back home and give him rent money for another week. i am so worried he is going to end up back in jail or become a drug addict or try to commit suicide. i dont know what to do. we cant let him live with us because he has to register as a sex offender and my mom does not approve of that. we can not bring him to the city now because we cant afford to pay $210 a week waiting for him to get a job (which takes up to a month sometimes). my family has told me to give it to GOD and let him handle everything. what should i do. i cant bare to see my fiance upset when he finds out that his brother has gone back to jail or died from drugs/suicide.
UPDATE:
he is not a bad guy. ive known him since he was released. he is actually the sweetest guy in my finace’s family. i know he is making some huge mistakes right now because of how hard his life since jail. the only reason he was put in jail was because he had a 16 or 17 year old g/f when he was around 20 and he cheated on her with another girl his age and the 17yr old got mad at him and reported him to get back at him. he in no way is a “child malester” or a “rapist”

My fiance’s brother was released from jail last year around thanksgiving. since then he was living with his step brother and his wife. he got his steb brothers wife pregnant and his family disowned him and would not let him live at thier home. he moved in with the pregnant wife and did not get a job in the whole 7 months he was living with her. she has kicked him out because the only jobs he could ever get (with his jail background) are ranch hand side jobs paying just a few dollars a day. now he is living in a motel with a bunch of bad people doing all kinds of drugs (ice, speed etc…) and is completely depressed about losing “the love of his life”. me and my fiance attempted to help him by bringing him to the city in hopes of a better chance for him to find a good job and his perole officer had called in sick that day so he could not leave. we were forced to go back home and give him rent money for another week. i am so worried he is going to end up back in jail or become a drug addict or try to commit suicide. i dont know what to do. we cant let him live with us because he has to register as a sex offender and my mom does not approve of that. we can not bring him to the city now because we cant afford to pay $210 a week waiting for him to get a job (which takes up to a month sometimes). my family has told me to give it to GOD and let him handle everything. what should i do. i cant bare to see my fiance upset when he finds out that his brother has gone back to jail or died from drugs/suicide.
UPDATE:
he is not a bad guy. ive known him since he was released. he is actually the sweetest guy in my finace’s family. i know he is making some huge mistakes right now because of how hard his life since jail. the only reason he was put in jail was because he had a 16 or 17 year old g/f when he was around 20 and he cheated on her with another girl his age and the 17yr old got mad at him and reported him to get back at him. he in no way is a “child malester” or a “rapist”

My fiance’s brother was released from jail last year around thanksgiving. since then he was living with his step brother and his wife. he got his steb brothers wife pregnant and his family disowned him and would not let him live at thier home. he moved in with the pregnant wife and did not get a job in the whole 7 months he was living with her. she has kicked him out because the only jobs he could ever get (with his jail background) are ranch hand side jobs paying just a few dollars a day. now he is living in a motel with a bunch of bad people doing all kinds of drugs (ice, speed etc…) and is completely depressed about losing “the love of his life”. me and my fiance attempted to help him by bringing him to the city in hopes of a better chance for him to find a good job and his perole officer had called in sick that day so he could not leave. we were forced to go back home and give him rent money for another week. i am so worried he is going to end up back in jail or become a drug addict or try to commit suicide. i dont know what to do. we cant let him live with us because he has to register as a sex offender and my mom does not approve of that. we can not bring him to the city now because we cant afford to pay $210 a week waiting for him to get a job (which takes up to a month sometimes). my family has told me to give it to GOD and let him handle everything. what should i do. i cant bare to see my fiance upset when he finds out that his brother has gone back to jail or died from drugs/suicide.
UPDATE:
he is not a bad guy. ive known him since he was released. he is actually the sweetest guy in my finace’s family. i know he is making some huge mistakes right now because of how hard his life since jail. the only reason he was put in jail was because he had a 16 or 17 year old g/f when he was around 20 and he cheated on her with another girl his age and the 17yr old got mad at him and reported him to get back at him. he in no way is a “child malester” or a “rapist”

My fiance’s brother was released from jail last year around thanksgiving. since then he was living with his step brother and his wife. he got his steb brothers wife pregnant and his family disowned him and would not let him live at thier home. he moved in with the pregnant wife and did not get a job in the whole 7 months he was living with her. she has kicked him out because the only jobs he could ever get (with his jail background) are ranch hand side jobs paying just a few dollars a day. now he is living in a motel with a bunch of bad people doing all kinds of drugs (ice, speed etc…) and is completely depressed about losing “the love of his life”. me and my fiance attempted to help him by bringing him to the city in hopes of a better chance for him to find a good job and his perole officer had called in sick that day so he could not leave. we were forced to go back home and give him rent money for another week. i am so worried he is going to end up back in jail or become a drug addict or try to commit suicide. i dont know what to do. we cant let him live with us because he has to register as a sex offender and my mom does not approve of that. we can not bring him to the city now because we cant afford to pay $210 a week waiting for him to get a job (which takes up to a month sometimes). my family has told me to give it to GOD and let him handle everything. what should i do. i cant bare to see my fiance upset when he finds out that his brother has gone back to jail or died from drugs/suicide.
UPDATE:
he is not a bad guy. ive known him since he was released. he is actually the sweetest guy in my finace’s family. i know he is making some huge mistakes right now because of how hard his life since jail. the only reason he was put in jail was because he had a 16 or 17 year old g/f when he was around 20 and he cheated on her with another girl his age and the 17yr old got mad at him and reported him to get back at him. he in no way is a “child malester” or a “rapist”

So basically my dad is an ex drug addict. And he has been around last year doing Meth and smoking Marijuana. He says he has stopped since this time around last year. He used to smoke pot infront of me. He lost his last job from drugs to.

He is about to get hired for a new job but they are making him take a drug test. So he asked my little brother to pee in a bottle for him. My dad told my little brother not to tell anybody but I found out because I was in his room and there was a bottle full of pee sitting on the floor behind his bed. So I asked him what it was for and he wouldn’t tell me for a while. And he finally said “its for dad” and I was like “what the phuck” Because my dad used to have me pee in a bottle for him to when I was my little brothers age. Which he is really young. And I don’t find it right for my dad to make my little brother go through all the abuse I did. That is mental abuse if you want my opinion. My dad knows im much older now and that I would tell my mom because I know better. So he obviously didn’t want me to find out.

Now my question is this. My brother told me that our dad said he only wanted to have him pee in the cup because he drinks to much alcohol. Does alcohol show up on drug tests and will it result in him not getting a job? Or is this just an excuse because hes still doing drugs? I mean I haven’t even seen him drinking much alcohol lately at all. Sounds like an excuse to me. What do you guys think?

By the way, im 18 years old now. My dad used to have me pee in the cup for him when I was my brothers age “12″ And at my last job I had alcohol in my system but I didn’t fail my drug test. So im really suspicious. My dad already cant be trusted cause of his bad history.

my bestfriends mom said she would because she doesnt think my moms a good mother
my mom has been married 4 time, she just got a divorse this summer, not has a new boyfriend we have to live with,
earlier this year she was NVR home
she relapsed for alcoholism this year
she doesnt like to take her bi polar medicine
she allllwwwaaayyysss ignores me now that she has a new boyfriend
and i am just allways sad:/ like she makes me feel horrible

how would i go about doing this, i know my mom would not want someone to adopt me, but my friends mom is willing,
my aunt also doesnt think my mom is putting me in a good envirorment
would i need my moms consent to get adopted?
pls help me

how do i even do this, where do i go to start this adoption
shes also has hit me

she always makes stupid cracks about how i’m not responsible and how i have no common sense and how i’m not book smart either. she also won’t allow me to do certain things (get a job, get my driver’s permit, get any pets, etc.) because she thinks this about me. and she let’s everyone know that she thinks this about me and even laughs at it.

i’ve never given her any reason to not trust me or think any of these things about me. i wash the dishes, i clean my room, i clean the house, i take care of the dog while they’re away on trips, i watch kids @ the local YMCA for voluntary community service. i’m never late for school, i always come home early, i call if i’m going to be late, she always knows where i am and who i’m with and it’s not like i can get away with anything at home, seeing as i dont even have a door. i get 112% in english and all she says is “well let’s see how long you keep it that way.” i write my own books, i read all the time voluntarily, i take a foreign language, i took band, i take photography and i ride horses. i dnt have sex, i dnt do drugs, i dnt smoke, and i do drink once in a while, but i never get drunk and someone sober is always there anyway. (hey, i’m in high school)

also, everything is always my fault to her. my 24 year old brother almost beats up a kid at my high school and it’s my fault that i won’t forgive him. he throws tantrums and threatens me so i run away and i’m tearing the family apart and she demands to know “do you know what it’s like for me?” she also lies to get me to come around and when i do, nothing’s changed and when i mention it, she brushes it off. it’s my fault that we don’t have enough money and whatever else.

i honestly don’t understand what i’m doing wrong so why does my mother do this?

ok so my parents have been together for about 30 years now.. and theyre always fighting well not always but through out their relationship they have had some fights here and there… just about a year and a half ago my dad lost his job of 20 years, but hes managed to maintain his weight, he was somewhat chubby…. he lost his job then it seemed everything has been going downhill from there.. he struggles in finding another job bcuz of the situation that he got fired in.. my mom has done nothing but support him, he hasnt really given up on his family at that point…. but then for the past several months my parents have been arguing alot!! and not like b4 its really bad.. but most of it has to do with my dad being at his moms house and spending his free time there with his brothers sisters nephews and neices , rather than showing any compassion for my mom and spending his free time with her.. i can honestly say that my dad is failing as a husband and doesnt seem to care and when i try to talk to him it seems like it goes in one ear and out the other…. it got to the point where he wants to move out, well he did just a couple of days ago, and he blames everything on my mom for driving him crazy.. i dont think thats a really good excuse, but he also says bcuz of my grandparents that live with us, and his job, and idk what else.. but he has so many excuses but none of them combined can explain to me how he can give up on being a dad and a husband, i mean he’s been through many situations with my mom but theyve worked it out as a team and got through it and got stronger from that, but this is real bad.. he doesnt want anything to do with us anymore… he just left us, my mom, me, my son, my 11 yr old brother.. he just like said good luck on your own guys, forget this im out… how come he didnt bail out a long time ago?? his moms house consists of beer drinkers, and gang bangers, drug dealers.. and im wondering if he is actually using drugs.. like meth, bcuz i know cocaine won’t do him that bad, its got to be either meth or heroin.. he’s always been a strong person, and prideful.. and i thought that was why he never took my advice.. but now im thinking different and it might possibly be drugs that hes doing.. or maybe hes found someone else… but hes like 42 yrs old? and has his family set up already, he’s too old to be acting childish… he’s been thru too much already.. someone plz tell me if it sounds like he is using, and tell me how i can tell.. bcuz i ask him and he denies it.. my older sister has asked him but she told HIM she knows he’s on drugs, and a drug addict always denies it.. and he didnt say nothing… o yeah, and he’s gotten skinny but he blames it on him losing his job, that he’s depressed and hasnt been eating well…. soo, wut do you guys think.. plz share..

She doesn’t want to have an abortion and plans to keep the baby, but she is knowingly living a very unhealthy lifestyle.

I mean, it’s HER body. But it’s also HIS child, so should it really be HER choice?

What can really be done if the mother decides she wants to abuse her body and that of her unborn child? We can’t very well put her in prison and FORCE her to be healthy, can we?

My stepson took 4x his sleeping medication last night and was stumbling around, basically “wasted”. During this time he mentioned that he had been smoking pot at his girlfriend’s house. When asked if the parents knew, he said yes. When asked if the girlfriend was smoking pot, he said he didn’t have permission to tell us. (This is how far gone he was.) Of course now in the light of day he tells us that this is all untrue. He was so out of it, I actually videotaped this conversation.

My question is:

How do I call these parents? What do I say? I don’t feel like I can let my stepson go over there without dealing with this. (He spends A LOT of time there.)

Thanks for any advice. A bit of background – he came to live with us from a rehab school that his mother had sent him to so I do know that he has a history of drug/alcohol abuse.

What would you do?

Thanks -

Sick of it Stepmom – Woodinville, WA

I have a friend that is 21 years old and he has been in and out of rehab for he past two years. He is a drug addict and alcoholic and cannot seem to cut it out. His mom is obsessed with catching him use drugs. She wakes him up every morning screaming at him and his little brother for almost no reason. His father has health problems, they’re resent and doctors still dont know exactly what it is thats wrong with him. A couple of days ago my friend found a bad in his mothers room filled with tape recorders and a recorder that records everything that he says on the landline phone. With the recorders and handful of tapes there were papers with phone numbers, addresses and random information of almost everyone he had ever encountered in his life. There were calendars with dates and times of everything that he did… everything from walking the dog at 9 o clock to possibly doing heroin (acting talkative) at 6:30. Although she probably doesn’t My friends mother seems to always get excited and almost happy when she catches him doing drugs or breaking the law. My friends girlfriend of almost three years is a recovering drug addict and alcoholic that has also been in and out of rehab for the past few years, however she has been sober for almost a year. My friend loves her with all of his heart but his mother hates her with a passion. She almost blames his girlfriend for his drug abbuse, even though he had been using drugs before he even met her. Although my friend now has a job and has been sober for a couple of months, Its seems like his mom trying so hard to catch him doing drugs just makes him WANT to do drugs even more. Is this what any mother would do or is my friends mom really crossing the line with the tape recordings of the sounds in his room and the tapped phones and detailed documenting of his day to day life?

I am doing a blood test and don’t want my mom to know that i am drinking will it show on the tests? and when smoking hubly will that be noticed on the tests?
how long does it take for your alcohol and smoke to get out of your system like a week a month or what?

My daughters mother has been out of her life for almost 5 years. My husbnd (her father) has sole legal custody of her. The judge, doctor,and counsoler said that there was to be zero contact ( that means all forms including third party) until she completed rehab and got out on her own and was drug free living in society for an extended period of time. The reasoning behind this was because rehab was completed once and we allowed visitation then only after 7 months she was arrested again. Well now that she is in rehab her mother (the grandmother) took it upon herself to start talking about the bio mom and giving her things from her.(She told our daughter to hide the things and not to tell us…resulting in having our daughter lie to us) This in turn upset our daughter and she started acting out. (She is preteen age) When confronted the grandmother admitted to it but said that she would continue to do it because she felt like it was best for our daughter to hear about her mom even though she was advised against it by the doctors. So now my husband has stopped visitation with the grandmother. I feel bad because I know this is hurting her……what is the right anwser here.
The reason for the not talking about her was because the child told the doctors that it was painful for her to her about her. That is how they based there decision. She does not bring up her mother the grandmother does.

My daughter’s father and I have a court ordered custody arrangement. The father was an alcoholic and drug user, and after he completed rehab I agreed to let him have visitations. We live in different states so his family picks her up and takes her to there home hours away. We recently became on ‘good terms’ and he began telling me scary things via the phone (shooting someone up with meth, drinking alcohol, living with a guy who uses drugs, how his mother is messed up on alcohol and xanax.) I am in fear of letting my daughter go out to see him now, but I don’t have any proof as to what he is doing except for what he tells me over the phone, which makes it difficult to take him to court. He won’t say anything incriminating over text messages or on my answering machine either. What can I do to protect my daughter?

My big brother is 17 and i am 14 and he has been in rehab for 3 months and is now clean off of heroin. But my mom is like not giving him any breathing room and is crowding him and just won’t let him do anything. Why is she doing this to him? He is clean its not like he is a convicted felon he wanted to get clean and he was using because he was so depressed all the time =(

She has been drinking for 8 years. She is verbally abusive when drunk. I fear she will die before she gets help.
I’ve had interventions. She’s gone in rehab twice. All she does there is make friends to drink with.
I can put up with seeing her, but it seems pointless because all she does is verbally insult me, for example, I walk in without saying a word to her house, she’ll say, “Yes b—h… I’m f—ing drunk. Leave me alone.”
Most of the time she doesn’t even remember seeing me because she blacks out.
It hurts to see her.
It hurts not to see her.
I think maybe not seeing her until she gets help could be one more bit of motivation to get her to get help.
However I also think she could use it as an excuse to kill herself, the lonliness pushing her over.
Its the ultimate if it doesn’t kill you, it will make you stronger.
I really want it to make her want to get help to be strong
I am in a state (MI) where families cannot force someone to be committed, otherwise I would try

i think there is something seriously wrong with me that no one else is picking up on.

i’ve been thru anxiety disorder, depression, OCD, panic attacks, anxiety attacks, my dad’s alcoholism, my parents’ unstable marriage, my mother’s cutting insensitivity and i’ve always been sensitive, and have very controlling parents. i don’t want sympathy, because other people have been thru worse.

all i’ve ever wanted was to feel like i was loved and like i belonged. i’m only 19 but i’ve had my heart broken so many times by people who didn’t even know they were breaking it because i was so afraid of coming off as too emotional, clingy etc.

i’m starting to realize that my dreams of being loved are not going to come true. i know the importance of loving thyself, and i’m learning but enough already.

i just get so irritated at times. can someone tell me what i’m doing wrong? or are some people just meant to be alone?

She has been drinking for 8 years. She is verbally abusive when drunk. I fear she will die before she gets help.
I’ve had interventions. She’s gone in rehab twice. All she does there is make friends to drink with.
I can put up with seeing her, but it seems pointless because all she does is verbally insult me, for example, I walk in without saying a word to her house, she’ll say, “Yes b—h… I’m f—ing drunk. Leave me alone.”
Most of the time she doesn’t even remember seeing me because she blacks out.
It hurts to see her.
It hurts not to see her.
I think maybe not seeing her until she gets help could be one more bit of motivation to get her to get help.
However I also think she could use it as an excuse to kill herself, the lonliness pushing her over.
Its the ultimate if it doesn’t kill you, it will make you stronger.
I really want it to make her want to get help to be strong
I am in a state (MI) where families cannot force someone to be committed, otherwise I would try