We will help you get your mom off drugs!

Even if it’s kind of a problem, but not really; she drinks a lot but doesn’t get drunk a whole lot?

Both of my parents were Alcoholics near the time they made me, though my mom quit drinking for the nine months she was carrying me, and my grandparents on both sides where Alcoholics as well. So I’m curious if I started drinking are my chances fairly high that I could begin to lose control over it and become an Alcoholic?

Thanks.

My alchoholic wife has left me and our 2 children for the second time. She is now seeing a deadbeat alcoholic. She voluntarily signed full custody of our 10 yr. old son and shared custody of 5 yr. old daughter to me. Wife has been told by her doctor a few times that she needs to go to rehab to dry out, she also take anti depressants. She has also been told by 2 different alcohol counselers that she needed rehab which she never done. I want to get full custody of my 5 yr. old cause of unhealthy situation at her mothers and wondered if her medical records and counselers records can be used in custody case at Family Court.

Some of mothers side of the family were alcoholics. Does this mean I could be too?

born in pittsburgh pa. dad left when i was 2. my mom moved back in with my grandparents. they raised me instead of her till i was 14. they die in a car accident when i was 14, which put me back in the care of mother who rejected me and put me out in streets. i fought through. found a job traveling the country selling books when i was around 18 or 19. came back to PA. after about a year of that. was homeless again. found stability with friends for a while. bouncing from house to house. trying to make it on my own a few times, and things would always happen to fall out from beneath me, no matter how hard i tried to keep them together. i don’t drink. i don’t do drugs. it was just 1 thing or another messing up my living situations. i recently moved in with my real dad, who again split when i was 2,and kinda just met the guy. He is a violent alcoholic, and i tried to talk to him about getting treatment to quit. he kicked mo out of his house saying “If i don’t like what he does in his house to get out and never come back.” He really kicked me out…I now have no where to go. I’m homeless, and don’t have many friends,and none that i could rely on for help in a situation like this. what do i do?

In 2004, my dearest aunt died from cirhossis of the liver. My mother has been dating a man on and off for about seven years who is a severe alcoholic. My family has endured many hardships, and it has been hard for me, even now at 18, to cope with such a tragic disease. I would like to start an organization that provides support to families, especially teens and children, that have had a similar experience to mine. Where do I start? Any suggestions?
I am looking also to possibly publish a collection of stories from the families of alcoholism. There are few to none organizations that I have found that are directed specifically towards those affected. Most are directed towards the alcoholic/drug abuser. Thanks for the responses and help! It is much appreciated! :)

my step-dad has been married with my mom for over 15 years
& its sad to say that he is an alcoholic
my mom has tried to help him in so many ways & he won’t quit drinking beer all the damn time

he still goes to work but he drives always being drunk
he got his second DUI in the summer
& he might be locked up his next court date is on dec
he is DIABETIC.. & he doesn’t eat
he is so skinny
he coughs up blood & bleeds blood out of his nose all the time
he has been close to strokes already he has chest pains
he WON”T go to a doctor & he gets mad for my mom trying to make him go
he drinks in the mornings before going to work in his lunch break after work & comes home late all the time
he just turned 49 years old but he’s been drinking for years..

my mom has given up hope & her mother in law doesn’t want her to leave my dad because she says he is sick but for my mom its hell to live with him already

he won’t admit he is alcoholic & won’t try to get help
do you think its so horrible for my mom to leave him because he has made her life hell & he is not happy either?
i don’t live at home anymore
& the only reason my mom stays with him is because he still pays the bills & rent but its getting to the point where not even that will make her stay
she rather rent an apt own her own with my bro [[15]] & sis[[12]]
he doesn’t even care about his kids with my mom
his other 4 kids with his first marriage have tried talking to him
his parents his brothers & sisters
nothing will work on him
he will just get pissed off & he tells my mom all the time that he’s tired of her
& then begs & cries to her that if she leaves him his life with be worse

My fiance has been an alcoholic since he was 17. Partly b/c his mother wanted a drinking buddy. He’s NOT abusive. If he was I wouldn’t be with him now. He just drinks way too much. He’s tried quitting and succeeded for about a week or two but then would relapse. I just don’t know what to do to help him keep going. It’s like the second he gets stressed out (which is usually after speaking to one of his parents) he just wants to drink. He refuses to go to AA which i’ve called a gotten info on. Everyone says he has to do it on his own. I just need to know IF there is ANYTHING i can do….. Without leaving,b/c we have a son together and I really don’t want him to be away from his daddy he loves so much. I just feel helpless.

My fiance has been an alcoholic since he was 17. Partly b/c his mother wanted a drinking buddy. He’s NOT abusive. If he was I wouldn’t be with him now. He just drinks way too much. He’s tried quitting and succeeded for about a week or two but then would relapse. I just don’t know what to do to help him keep going. It’s like the second he gets stressed out (which is usually after speaking to one of his parents) he just wants to drink. He refuses to go to AA which i’ve called a gotten info on. Everyone says he has to do it on his own. I just need to know IF there is ANYTHING i can do….. Without leaving,b/c we have a son together and I really don’t want him to be away from his daddy he loves so much. I just feel helpless.

My father in law was taken to the hospital unresponsive about a month ago. He had been drinking and the following afternoon he had vomited while passed out in his bed. My mother in law heard him choking and since she knew that he was choking on his vomit she called 911 and they brought him in. At 1pm his BAL was 236 (equivelant to abround .2% from what I’m told) He had alot of vomit in his lungs and I guess they had to give him CPR twice and the last time he almost didn’t come around…he had been sedated for over a week while he detoxed . When he woke he said that he had only a few drinks. Apparently a nurse had been Rxing him 3 different types of depression pills (a Dr at the hospital explained she shouldn;t have and the pills she was giving him she himself wouldn’t have Rxed. My FIL seems to think that it was the pills that put him in the hospital. We all know he has a major drinking problem abnd the last 2-3 months have been particularly bad. I know what effects the pills will have on him, especially while drinking…what I am not sure of is….he says he only had a few drinks. How can this be if his alcohol level was 236 at 1 pm the next afternoon!!!??? I know the BAL doesn’t go down comptley if someone is maintaining that high by drinking everyday…but he seems to think the pills made his alcohol level go up…I say its impossible. Can someone tell me what the blood test will show, and if the level is effected by pills or is it strictly alcohol? ANY advise will help. He seems to be fixed on the pills was the problem attitude when really, he has a drink problem. I want to know if he is in denial and trying to displace the responcibility?

We are in a country with so much to offer and so many other REAL problems.Why do we feel we have to invent new ones. Before you go off,I was diagnosed with depression,but instead of pumping those ridiculous drugs into my body(that doctors receive perks for prescribing), I looked within,got off my ***,and did something about it. I supported myself from the time I was 16 because my mother lost everything to gambling and alcohol. Calling these thing diseases is simply an excuse to take the blame off of yourself. cancer,diabetes,parkinsons,THESE ARE DISEASES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m a wife and mother who has found myself overwhelmed by my alcohol use. What started out as something to relax or calm my nerves over the stresses of marriage, work etc has multiplied into a problem. Now I am drinking every single day, earlier sometimes too. I also smoke cigarettes and run off to the bar because I don’t want to drink or smoke around my daughter.

I need some words of encouragement because it feels like i’m not strong enough to stop this cycle. I am wasting money, like $200 a month on my drinking/cigarette habits. I want to stop but when the stress starts, it seems it’s the only release I have.

HELP!
OK. Those quotes didn’t really help me with my problem but thanks, it is interesting. I’m not only talking about Christianity, but believers of God, in general.

my dad is an alcoholic and not just any alcohloic but a mean one. he spends his entire evening out in the garage drinking beer after beer and then comes into the house and becomes an “Instant Asshole”. He treats my mother and i like we a worthless. he has threatened me physically and has even kicked me out of the house when i was only 12 years old. it has gotten to the point where i cannot even stand to be in my house. i’m going to college soon and he has now been threatening to remove all financial support for my education. how can i confront my father on his problem with out 1 – loosing all payment for school, 2- being kicked out of my house, or 3 – ending up in the hospital or worse?

My dad has been drinking heavily for around 10 years, but he drank quite alot before that. His wife, my mother, died 14 years ago and ever since he’s been incredibly depressed and suicidal. He’s been to the doctors many, many times and he’s been in AA meetings but then he just relapses and we’re back to square 1. It’s just been going on too long. It’s wearing on me and I’m scared he’s going to die. I’m 18 and pregnant. I don’t want my baby around him if he’s drunk all the time.
What can I do?

My mother is an alcoholic and is steadily getting worse. It is killing her, both it and her smoking habits according to her doctor. I want to know if I can gain power of attorney without her permission as she is an alcoholic. I want power of attorney for 2 reasons. Number one, a relative is encouraging her and providing her with alcohol regularly and is the only reason she both chooses and can continue her destructive habits. I own her car and could easily prevent her buying alcohol is it were not for him and want to see about a restraining order. Also, she is slowly putting herself into financial jeopardy and will eventually not be able to pay her bills. I would like to control her retirement and social security and help her pay her bills and prevent her from taking out a 4th mortgage among other things. Can I do this? Would being an addict make someone not of sound mind?
Actually, she’s more likely to sign when sh’e drunk, but I know that’s illegal and probably won’t hold up in court.

she is ruining my life and her own.I am way over 18
she is suicidal when she gets drunk too.
She has been this way all my life and i am 29 now and i am just really fed up she is constantly calling me too help her but then when it comes down to going she decides not to..i have her on video saying she wants to go and she needs help.

My mother is an alcoholic and has been for as long as I’ve been alive, probably much longer. It has only been getting worse. I am now 20. She has lost her job, been on unemployment for almost a year and is about to run out of benefits.
She got evicted from her home, moved in with her ex boyfriend who was (and still is) very abusive and also unemployed. They are now getting evicted from their trailer.
She has nowhere to go but cross country with her parents. She drinks anywhere from 15-30 beers a day, whole bottles of wine from time to time, and is becoming dependent on sleeping pills.
She refuses help and refuses to see a doctor, even though she will sometimes vomit blood. She now wakes up in the morning with the shakes, and is starting to see that drinking is a problem, but will refuse any help.
I need some sort of resources. I live in the Dallas, Tx area. I have nobody to talk to about this and don’t know what there is to do. No insurance, no money. She will not go on her own, an intervention may be necessary. If there is any way for me to sign her in, I will do it. She NEEDS help, and I need help dealing with this. I can’t keep watching my mother die, it is putting too much pressure on me. It is tearing me apart.
She is a wonderful, beautiful, caring person and I would not be where I am if it was not for her. There is nobody else she talks to or relies on but me. I am her only friend.
Please tell me what I can do.

My mom is an alcoholic and has been for about 5 years. Her face is puffy and her abdomen is bloated. Her arms and legs are just flesh and bone. She doesn’t look healthy. She is in total denial that she has a problem. On top of that, her mother died a few years ago of cirrhosis of the liver. She is now taking care of her boyfriend who lives with her and is in the final stages of cirrhosis. Her boyfriend is dying in her home, right in front of her and she continues to drink. I honestly don’t know what her “rock bottom” is, that is, if it’s not death. She lives in another state so there’s not much I can personally do to help her. Can somebody help me? I don’t know what kind of help I’m seeking here, but if anybody has any advice on how I should confront her or if anyone knows anything about liver disease and whether or not I should be concerned about the health of her liver based on her physical appearance, it would greatly be appreciated.

I was raised on the belief that “a village raises a child” in the many places I’ve been this is still the motto. However, from what I’ve seen in the American and Canadian suburbs only the parents of the child get involved, nobody else is allowed to (except school teachers to a certain extent).

Is it like that in every suburb?

Here is the dilemma:

My cousin and her husband have 2 children. One is age 13 and one is age 7. The husband is an alcoholic and the mother denies this problem. I am too young to talk to her directly as she is twice my age. I work with at-risk children and their children definitely have issues because of their father’s heavy drinking.

My biggest concern is the father’s judgement. When drunk (often) he swears up a storm at the boys, chokes them, or engages in dangerous behaviour such as driving drunk with the boys.

My mother addressed the situation saying to go to al-anon. She denied there was a problem.

Do I not get involved because they’re “not my kids” or does it take a village to raise a child?

Suburban parents I’m interested in what you have to say!
Kat H

You are so right. If people don’t want your help you are wasting your own time. My concern is for the safety of the boys. The best I can do is when they come to play with my kids teaching them about making safe choices. I’ve spoken to the 7 yr old about making healthy choices and when he’s an adult not drinking to get drink. He has explained to me that he knows because it affects your behavior and your liver. Smart kid!
mEn7al

I appreciate your response. However, not getting involved would mean no child abuse is ever reported. This is why, and I work with foster children, there is a hidden crisis of child abuse in the suburbs that goes unreported.
Preggo

CPS has been called 4x’s in the past, once even by the father’s own parents. Nothing changed b/c they make a very good living. You’d be surprised CPS turns down a lot of cases.

I work with at-risk youth including foster children. I worked with a girl whose mother was a crack addicted prostitute but got to keep her because she still clothed and fed her.
Emoja: What you explained is exactly how I feel this is exactly what I have been doing and continue to do so.

Another option is to simply care for those children. Pick them up regularly, take them out to do things, out for dinner, to the park. Teach them how to be confident and stand up for themselves. Have them sleep over often, be there for them, become a mentor and a role model for them.

My mom is an alcoholic and has been for about 5 years. Her face is puffy and her abdomen is bloated. Her arms and legs are just flesh and bone. She doesn’t look healthy. She is in total denial that she has a problem. On top of that, her mother died a few years ago of cirrhosis of the liver. She is now taking care of her boyfriend who lives with her and is in the final stages of cirrhosis. Her boyfriend is dying in her home, right in front of her and she continues to drink. I honestly don’t know what her “rock bottom” is, that is, if it’s not death. She lives in another state so there’s not much I can personally do to help her. Can somebody help me? I don’t know what kind of help I’m seeking here, but if anybody has any advice on how I should confront her or if anyone knows anything about liver disease and whether or not I should be concerned about the health of her liver based on her physical appearance, it would greatly be appreciated.