We will help you get your mom off drugs!

Dear Sir:
I am not sure to send this e-mail when I have finshed it. I’m praying it makes it’s way into the right hands..I desperately need some intervention. My story is long and I apologize if I don’t tell it well but it truely comes from my heart…
In June of 2004 my husband and I took in my cousins children. 2 beautiful girls that immediatly stole our hearts. We agreed to this only because we were told the parents were giving them up for adoption. They said we had to wait for them to get out of jail to sign the papers..We trusted them. A months later the mother was released from county jail and we had to return the girls. In November of the same year and the mother called us again and asked if we could keep the children for 6 months while she went back to jail. No one else wanted them. They were 1 & 2 yrs old. Of course, we took them back gratefully. The mother ended up doing 13 months in prison on drug charges…The father did too.
My husband and I called every agency including DCFS to try to keep custody of the children and was told we were to far down the blood line to have any say in the children and that it was DCFS’s policy to clean the parents up, not to remove the children. Once again, we had to turn the children over and the mother refused to let us see them for 7 months.
In September of 2006, I get another call from the mother asking if I’ll take them and put them in school because she had no one to take care of them. Of course, I went and got them. I had them for another for another 11months.
In August of 2007, the grandfather was released from prison and reunited with the grandmother, who was also recently released from prison, decided they wanted the children back where they lived so once again, we had to return the children. 3 months later my husband and I gave up our jobs and apartment and moved to the city the girls lived in so we could at least see them. That month, the mother went back to jail, the father was released from prison and the children lived at their grandparents and we weren’t allowed to see them.
In August of 2008, my husband and I had to move where there was work and begged the mother when she got out of jail to let the kids come w/ us and we would help her find a place and get off the dope. The following month, the mother was busted smoking crack and the children were placed with the grandparents thru Luthern Services.We have not seen them since!!! We have been approved for visitation over a year ago but denied the visits because their Grandparents doesn’t want us to have anything to do with them so DCFS abided by their wishes. I can’t understand why the children were placed with them in the first place. They both have extensive histories of prison, violence and drug abuse just like the parents.
I recently called Luthern Services and was informed that the grandparents want to adopt which means we will never get to see the children we have loved and raised all these years. Don’t we have any rights? I have called agency after agency for the last 5 years trying to adopt these kids. I have followed all the rules and depended on the system not to fail us or the children but once again it has done just that!!! Can we contest the adoption and file ourselves? This is so unfair to us and the children. If you can get them away from the grandparents and convince them you wont tell, they will tell you the want to live with us. Each time we have had to turn them over they had to be pried out of our arms. Isn’t there anyone out the who can help us? All of us!!! Imagine loving and raising 2 children as your own all this time then be denied of seeing them ever again. This is just wrong on so many levels!!! Even if we cannot contest the adoption, is there anyway we can legally get some type of visitation? We are desperate. Everyday without them is a living hell!!! It’s like part of us is lost. Please help us or at least point us in the right direction for help. We have about 6 months before the adoption and we don’t know what else to do!!!

Thank You,
I have been doing internet searches for weeks but can’t seem to get anywhere. Just more phone #s of people who “can’t help” us. I was hoping to come across someone here that might have the right answers, not to cry “boo hoo” !!!
I forgot to add than I live in Central Illinois and I have called several attorneys and the few that will concider want huge retainers and all the others don’t want to fight DCFS. I have been calling state agencies for the last 5 years trying to get these children removed from that environment.

What are the psychological consequences of a kid, who was say, adopted at 8 and had an alcoholic, previously heroin addicted birth mother, and never knew their father? Anyone experienced in psychology or social work or something could help.
Was anyone adopted when they were a kid, what has your life been like after that?

I am currently going through an adoption homestudy and my mother is an alcoholic. I don’t have much contact with her and when I do see her she is always sober. My children would never be around her without another adult ect. I have dealt with her alcoholism as my sister is an addiction conselor and my father is a M.D. Just wondering the social worker will see this as an issue?

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I am currently applying to adopt a child and have a home study coming up. My husband and I both have misdemeanors on our records. I have 3 MIC and my husband has 4. I am now 25 and my husband is 28. These misdemeanors all happened before we were 21. We have no other criminal background. I also have a mother who has been battling alcoholism for the last few years. She has been in treatment, but still struggles. She would not have ANY contact with my children if she is drinking, ect. Nor would she ever be left alone with my children (regardless if she is sober) without another adult such as my father. Just wondering how these skeletons in my closet can affect my adoption? And how I should approach them with the social worker? Thanks