I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive him, but a part of me wants to talk to him and find out why he does the things he does. But then I think that his answer will just make me feel even worse about things. He’s an alcoholic and a drug addict and recently went into a rehabilitation center, but I don’t think I can trust him to go through on his word. Living with him was a living nightmare. He was insane, raped and beat my mother, and scared the living shit out of me every day. The day we finally left, my mom had just gotten a protection order and we rented a UHAUL and took whatever we could fit, and anything else we just left. He stood across the street with a gun. I thought the nightmare was over and then my mother got back together with him and forced me to have a relationship with him. Eventually it ended. I still live in fear. Every time I hear a motorcycle I think its him and I can’t move. Should I try and have contact with him, or just move on with my life?

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