I am currently applying to adopt a child and have a home study coming up. My husband and I both have misdemeanors on our records. I have 3 MIC and my husband has 4. I am now 25 and my husband is 28. These misdemeanors all happened before we were 21. We have no other criminal background. I also have a mother who has been battling alcoholism for the last few years. She has been in treatment, but still struggles. She would not have ANY contact with my children if she is drinking, ect. Nor would she ever be left alone with my children (regardless if she is sober) without another adult such as my father. Just wondering how these skeletons in my closet can affect my adoption? And how I should approach them with the social worker? Thanks
The best advice with respect to handling this question with your social worker: be honest. There’s a criminal background check as part of most home studies, so the social worker is going to find out about the misdemeanors. Most likely, they will not have any impact provided that you’re honest about them, and make sure to indicate to the social worker that you and your husband recognize the missteps, regret them, and have “turned the corner” on any further missteps.
I’m an adoption social worker, and I’m afraid my news is not good.
The alcoholic mother is not an issue…she doesn’t live with you and you already said you wouldn’t leave the children with her alone.
But you have 3 misdemeanors and your husband has four? Sorry, I would not approve you. If you are only 25 and they happened between the ages of 17-21, in my opinion, not enough time has past to show adequate improvement……
Now, if you have several charges stemming from the same incident (which can happen) that might be different. It would also depend on the nature of the charges…if they are alcohol related and you have an alcoholic parent, there is a serious concern.
Plus, we are talking BOTH parents having multiple misdemeanors which are fairly recent.
Do not lie to your social worker, tell her right up front what the charges are and when they were…..you may save yourself some time and money…plus they will run a criminal check and know anyway.
You may also want to try and get your records expunged.
Good luck! But sorry, it does not look good. You need to remember that even if your social worker can look past it, you will be presented to birth parents, who may not see past it….or other social workers if you are doing special needs, who will not see past it.
I also place children, and based on what your saying in your question, I would not select you for one of my children.
Sorry to be hurtful, but this is reality….maybe in a few years….but like I said, I don’t know the nature of your charges or when they were or how many incidents there were.
I work for the courts in Indiana. It honestly doesn’t matter how long ago it was, but what they will be looking for is what the Mis. are for. If there is anything on there for battery or any physical contact with someone else, you may get looked at a little harder. If its anything to do with a kid, you wont have a chance. They know that everyone makes mistakes in their lifes when they are young and dumb ( no offense) im the same way, so as long as its nothing to do with a child you should be fine.